Is It The 40s ?

Since I was behind in my blogs, I decided to write another one the week before my Birthday.  Sometimes I think birthdays are overrated.  Or perhaps it's my view in life or depression of being middle-age.  Now I shall be 41 years old and I am in a much better space than I was last year;  and by next year I will be in a much better place - literally!  I remember thinking to myself last year how I have not completed what I should have accomplished 20 years ago, and became quite ill with myself - full of disappointment.  But then I realized after much soul-searching, that things do happen for a reason.  For reasons we do not know or understand and might never will, however there is a purpose.  I am sure without a doubt I can give you a hundred excuses to why I never fulfilled my goals.  We all have them. " I was young and stupid, I did not take it seriously, I was not mature enough, I had no one to guide me, I don't have the money " etc...  If we continue to lament over these things we could have, should have and would have done - it will just tear you apart deep down inside.

Instead, you have to look at each experience whether good or bad as a learning experience and learn from it.  Turn every negative experience into a positive one.  For example, I regret that I never completed college when I should have, but I turned it around and said to myself - I will finish now!  I also think perhaps I should have had children younger, but honestly thinking about it - I was not ready.  I also realized I have an advantage over most.  I watch all my friends have children young (including my parents) and I know what mistakes they had made and what to avoid.  I am also more mature, and  financially I am more equipped to stay home with my children than my peers were twenty years ago.  I must admit sometimes I am a little jealous of my friends and family members who are now "empty-nesters", with some of their kids in college already - but then what would I be doing now?  Going out partying and drinking with friends - at this age,  does not seem appealing or appropriate to me.  I now have to turn down invitations to meet-up and let's hang - but then I say to myself  "been there, done that."  I am enjoying this life right now for what it is and if you would have asked me year ago I probably would have been sobbing with self-pity.  You must turn things around for yourself - because no one is going to do it for you...

I leave you with a quote I wrote on Facebook last year (10/30/2011) on my 40th birthday:

Ode to Myself at 40

I am not where I want to be in my life right now, or where I should be - but I am doing what needs to be done.  I have yet accomplished my goals that I set for myself more than 20 years ago - but I will achieve them!  I do not know everything, but one thing I know for sure - is that life is too precious, too short, and for some too hard!  I Thank GOD everyday and every night for what I do have...
And I humbly THANK you all!